GuestBloggers

On Shaima Alawadi, family violence, and hate crimes

Wed, 11 Apr 2012 15:34:00 GMT

by By Karla Kellam

As the facts about the Shaima Alawadi murder case continue to trickle in, it appears more and more that she was the victim of family violence, rather than a hate crime. As somebody who works to prevent family violence at Project Sakinah, this does not come as a surprise to me—nor was it an unexpected turn of events to many of us in the domestic violence/family violence community. Of all the women killed in America in 2007, 64% of them died at the hands of a family member or an intimate partner. While it is possible that this might be matricide, which is exceedingly rare (85% of children who murder one or more of their parents are male), family violence is not.

Tags: Muslim Domestic Violence,Muslim domestic abuse,Quran,Hadith,Prophet Mohammad,Muslim Battered Women,Muslim Abusive Relationships,Muslim Abusive Marriage,Daraba,Nushuz,Muslim wife beating,Muslim Community,Muslim women rights,Muslim Support,Muslim Help,Activism,Shaima Alawadi

Category: Activism

Category: Domestic Abuse

NOUR: Where There Is Injustice, You Will Find Justice

Mon, 27 Jun 2011 20:05:00 GMT

by Hafeeza Kelli Yasmin
June 3, 2011

This is part of a series of posts entitled “Muslims Making a Difference,” featuring Muslims benefiting society at different levels.

Domestic violence is an issue within Islam which is intolerable; it is a sign of oppression, and Allah ‘azza wajal condemns oppression.

The name Nour in Arabic means angelic light, and thus a name that reflects peace, tranquillity and hope. It is a metaphor for the light at the end of the tunnel, to bring back hope in those who have fallen victims of the devastating sin of domestic violence. Nour launched its website in 2010 and has now earned the title of a non-profit charity.

What makes Nour stand out from all the rest is that they are able to recognise the Islamic faith and the sensitivity that comes with domestic violence. Unfortunately, many Muslims ignorantly adopt the false impression that Islam permits the act of domestic violence

Hurting Homes

Mon, 27 Jun 2011 19:17:00 GMT

by Munira Lekovic Ezzeldine
June 20, 2011

Abuse is a topic that many Muslims shy away from because it is uncomfortable to tackle an issue that is complex and appears unsolvable. Many times when I address the topic of marriage, I clarify that the strategies I suggest do not apply to abusive relationships. Yet, what I have learned is that people who are in abusive relationships don’t acknowledge the abuse and instead try to do everything to “fix” their marriage and resolve the unhappiness they feel. Abusive relationships have a completely different dynamic and “marriage advice” cannot solve the problem of abuse. Sadly people do not understand that an abusive relationship is a dysfunctional relationship, therefore the only way the relationship can change is if both husband and wife get professional counseling because without intervention the abuse will only get worse and the relationship will continue to deteriorate.

Preventing Sexual and Domestic Violence Before it Occurs

Tue, 01 Mar 2011 05:00:00 GMT

by Sandra Molinari

Sandra Molinari has worked in the sexual and domestic violence field for the better part of a decade. She discusses the need for prevention and the underlying causes of domestic and sexual violence, including the underlying causes at the community and societal levels.

"Why not instead ask the question, 'Why did X hurt Y? And how can X and others be prevented from hurting people in the future?' As a woman in one of my groups once put it: All this empowerment work that is focused on us survivors of domestic violence is great: I can tell you I’m never going to put up with that kind of abuse again! But what about my ex? He’s just going to move on to another woman and start beating her up. What are we going to do about him? Where does the violence end?…

Category: Activism

Category: Domestic Abuse

Abuse of Women is Sadly Endemic

Mon, 21 Feb 2011 05:00:00 GMT

by Parvez Ahmed

Amidst all the euphoria about Egypt’s peaceful revolution, the news of CBS news reporter Lara Logan being sexually assaulted fell like a ton of bricks. The people of Egypt, especially its youth, have been such an inspiration that any hint of deviant behavior understandably elicits gasps and should provoke soul searching. Sadly, the incident is not that isolated.

Have You Stopped Beating Your Wife? The Quran, Hadith and Domestic Violence

Tue, 25 Jan 2011 17:44:00 GMT

Written by Usama Hassan

God and Muhammad, peace be upon him, clearly wished to ban domestic violence, as numerous hadiths indicate. The verse was always known to be a temporary compromise, an extremely limited concession that required minimum use of violence, if at all. “New” findings are:

1. Numerous hadiths say emphatically, “Don’t beat your wives.” The Qur’an apparently says, “You may beat your wives.” This apparent difficulty must be resolved. The verse is perhaps the most quoted by critics and enemies of Islam, the Qur’an and the Prophet Muhammad, peace be upon him.

2. The article tries to highlight a basic and serious flaw with the way many Muslims read and teach the Qur’an, including some preachers and clerics. Helping to correct this problem will, God-willing, open the way to dealing with numerous other controversial issues and “problematic” ayahs and hadiths.

3. Many issues around human rights and women’s rights, gender-equality, dhimmitude etc. may be fruitfully-addressed along similar lines.

Tags: Quran,Hadith,Prophet Mohammad,Daraba,Nushuz,Muslim Domestic Violence,Muslim domestic abuse,Muslim Battered Women,Muslim Abusive Relationships,Muslim Abusive Marriage,Muslim Community,Muslim women rights,Muslim wife beating

Category: Domestic Abuse

Domestic Violence, Islam and Muslim Women

Wed, 01 Dec 2010 16:19:00 GMT

Written by Anntoinette Cooper

The stereotypical views and myths associated with Islam and Muslim women; the generalization of the Muslim population by mainstream society and the countless fears of victims which include the threat of deportation, blacklisting from the religious community, mistreatment from authority figures, undue scrutiny of Islam and the list goes on. All of these add to the already complex issue of domestic violence within our community making it even more compound.

Tags: Daraba,Nushuz,Quran,Hadith,Prophet Mohammad,Muslim Domestic Violence,Muslim domestic abuse,Muslim Battered Women,Muslim Abusive Relationships,Muslim Abusive Marriage,Muslim Community,Muslim Support,Muslim Help

Category: Activism

Category: Domestic Abuse

Domestic Violence: A Violation of Islam

Fri, 01 Oct 2010 02:25:00 GMT

A WISE Publication

Domestic violence, also known as “intimate partner violence,” is a form of violent or oppressive domination over a family member or partner. It occurs in families and relationships around the world and across culture, religion, race, and geography. Domestic violence manifests in various forms, most commonly as physical violence, but also as emotional abuse and financial control. Many of those who suffer from domestic violence fear for the safety of their lives and are thus reluctant to come forward. Although domestic violence victimizes both men and women, the majority of the victims are women.

As a worldwide phenomenon, domestic violence remains an ever-present reality in the lives of millions of Muslims. Throughout the world, violence destroys the ability of Muslim women to thrive within their families, communities, and nations. Moreover, perpetrators of domestic violence often try to justify their acts in the name of Islam.

Tags: Daraba,Nushuz,Quran,Hadith,Prophet Mohammad,Muslim Domestic Violence,Muslim Battered Women,Muslim Abusive Relationships,Muslim Abusive Marriage,Muslim Community,Muslim wife beating,Muslim women rights

Category: Domestic Abuse

Honor and Terror

Fri, 01 Oct 2010 02:10:00 GMT

Written by Rafia Zakaria

The killers of 16-year-old Aqsa Pervez were convicted on June 18. Mohammad Pervez and Waqas Ahmed, Aqsa’s father and brother, were sentenced to life in prison by a jury in Ontario, Canada.

Aqsa was killed after being picked up by her brother from her school bus stop. She was taken to the family home where she was found dead by the police. DNA material belonging to her brother was found under her fingernails and her father confessed to the murder.
According to accounts published in Canadian newspapers, Mohammad Pervez killed his daughter because she did not subscribe to his conservative values. She wanted to get a part-time job and did not want to have an arranged marriage. According to a statement made by Aqsa’s mother, Mohammad Pervez told her that he had killed his youngest child because “the community will say that you have not been able to control your daughter” and “this is my insult, she has made me naked”.

On Dec 10, 2007, the day of her death, Aqsa was tricked into coming back home and then strangled. The cause of her death was deemed to be asphyxiation and evidence showed that Aqsa had fought for her life in her last moments. On the day the sentence was announced, Aqsa’s mother was present in court and pleaded to the judge to spare her husband and son.

Tags: Muslim Honor Killing,Muslim Family Violence,Adultery,Muslim Child Abuse,Quran,Hadith,Muslim women rights,Muslim dating,Muslim abuse,Muslim Relationships,Muslim Community

Category: Child Abuse

Category: Honor Killing

Muslims Working Against Domestic Violence

Fri, 01 Oct 2010 01:58:00 GMT

Written by Imam Johari Abdul Malik

I was quoted in a NY Times article about the outstanding work that Muslim activists are doing across the country to prevent domestic violence in our communities. Many of us have been doing this work for many years, and I was featured in a front page article in the NY Times nearly 20 years ago about my work mentoring new fathers in a community based grass root effort in Washington, D.C. My wife, Nia Seale, was working in that same institution with young mothers.

However, I want to be clear that we reject the implication that Islam is somehow inherently violent against women and that a “new interpretation” is needed to address this problem. Our goal is to return people to the original and proper understanding of the Qur’an and Sunnah on this issue. We believe that the Words of the Qur’an are the Words of God revealed to the Prophet Muhammad (peace and blessings be upon him) and that it has been preserved. The Prophet Muhammad (peace be upon him) – who is the best example – never beat his wives. The Qur’an calls upon men to be maintainers and protectors of women and this is a religion of expressing God’s love (rahma) and being kind to one’s spouse. The goal of a marriage in Islam is to promote love and compassion between the spouses and the family in general.

Category: Activism

Category: Domestic Abuse