Posted by Zerqa Abid on 8/22/2011 7:39 AM

 As I write this post, it has been five days since the murder of Nazish Noorani, 27, a mother of two, in Boonton, NJ.   

A week prior to her death, she texted her brother...

 "I dont no wht to do…Cant talk to him cuz he abuse me than…He dosent wanna live with me…I dont no kids get scared of him sometimes…I m so tired of this…I dont no i m scared…someday u will find me dead but its cuz of kashi…he wants to kill me."

Unfortunately, regardless of her warning, she could not save herself. Her husband, Kashif Pervaiz, successfully plotted and killed her with the help of his girlfriend, Antoinette Stephen.  

Posted by Zerqa Abid on 1/26/2011 11:24 AM

 February 12, 2010, marked the first anniversary of the gruesome murder of general manager and co-founder of Bridges TV, Sister Aasiya Zubair Hassan. She was killed by her husband, Muzzammil Hassan, the other co-founder and CEO of Bridges TV.

Many of you know by reading my earlier posts on the topic that this particular murder had hit me and my family very hard. We felt the Zubair family’s pain directly, as we knew if we had not acted on time the dead victim could have been my first cousin, Sadia, instead of Aasiya. Sadia is Muzzammil’s ex-wife. We were thankful to Allah for saving Sadia’s life. At the same time, we were very sad for losing Sr. Aasiya at the hand of an established, known abuser. Since we personally knew many major players of the story, our reaction has been mixed with grief and anger. Grief for Aasiya’s children and her family. Anger toward the community and friends around the couple.

Posted by GuestBloggers on 1/25/2011 12:44 PM

Written by Usama Hassan

God and Muhammad, peace be upon him, clearly wished to ban domestic violence, as numerous hadiths indicate. The verse was always known to be a temporary compromise, an extremely limited concession that required minimum use of violence, if at all. “New” findings are:

1. Numerous hadiths say emphatically, “Don’t beat your wives.” The Qur’an apparently says, “You may beat your wives.” This apparent difficulty must be resolved. The verse is perhaps the most quoted by critics and enemies of Islam, the Qur’an and the Prophet Muhammad, peace be upon him.

2. The article tries to highlight a basic and serious flaw with the way many Muslims read and teach the Qur’an, including some preachers and clerics. Helping to correct this problem will, God-willing, open the way to dealing with numerous other controversial issues and “problematic” ayahs and hadiths.

3. Many issues around human rights and women’s rights, gender-equality, dhimmitude etc. may be fruitfully-addressed along similar lines.

Posted by GuestBloggers on 12/1/2010 11:19 AM

Written by Anntoinette Cooper  

The stereotypical views and myths associated with Islam and Muslim women; the generalization of the Muslim population by mainstream society and the countless fears of victims which include the threat of deportation, blacklisting from the religious community, mistreatment from authority figures, undue scrutiny of Islam and the list goes on. All of these add to the already complex issue of domestic violence within our community making it even more compound.

Posted by GuestBloggers on 9/30/2010 8:58 PM

Written by Imam Johari Abdul Malik

I was quoted in a NY Times article  about the outstanding work that Muslim activists are doing across the country to prevent domestic violence in our communities. Many of us have been doing this work for many years, and I was featured in a front page article in the NY Times nearly 20 years ago about my work mentoring new fathers in a community based grass root effort in Washington, D.C. My wife, Nia Seale, was working in that same institution with young mothers.

However, I want to be clear that we reject the implication that Islam is somehow inherently violent against women and that a “new interpretation” is needed to address this problem. Our goal is to return people to the original and proper understanding of the Qur’an and Sunnah on this issue. We believe that the Words of the Qur’an are the Words of God revealed to the Prophet Muhammad (peace and blessings be upon him) and that it has been preserved. The Prophet Muhammad (peace be upon him) – who is the best example – never beat his wives. The Qur’an calls upon men to be maintainers and protectors of women and this is a religion of expressing God’s love  (rahma) and being kind to one’s spouse. The goal of a marriage in Islam is to promote love and compassion between the spouses and the family in general.

Posted by GuestBloggers on 9/30/2010 8:01 PM

Written by Mehnaz M. Afridi 
Courtesy:  Common Ground News Service (CGNews)

Los Angeles, California - International Women’s Day on 8 March provides an opportunity to raise awareness of the work women are doing to combat gender inequality. Violence and inequality affect women around the world, including women in Muslim societies who, like their non-Muslim counterparts, are engaged on a day-to-day basis to improve their environments for the better.

Travelling back and forth to Muslim-majority countries such as Pakistan, I witness the amazing work that women are doing both for human rights and economic growth firsthand. Women are running companies, shelters and businesses, and countering the images of disenfranchised, illiterate and socially deprived Muslim women so pervasive in Western media.

Bushra Aslam, for example, opened an orphanage in Islamabad for young girls after the 2005 Pakistani earthquake. She provides educators, mentors, counsellors and interfaith activities for the 45 girls living there. Another inspiring figure is Rukhsana Asghar, the president of Fulcrum, a Pakistan-based human resources consulting company that offers scholarships to train girls from poor families in preparation for jobs.

Posted by GuestBloggers on 9/30/2010 6:03 PM
Muslim Men Against Domestic Abuse interviewed Imam Zaid Shakir about the problem of domestic abuse. Imam Shakir has addreesed this problem in details while elaborating on Quranic verses and Hadith that may have refered to domestic abuse. Here is a video that has been posted with the permission of MMADA.
Posted by GuestBloggers on 9/22/2010 8:00 PM

Written by Dr. M.N. Tarazi

Saturday, July 17, 2010

"Your mother is so great that I did not have to beat her up once in the thirty years we have been married!" a father told his sons as he was trying to praise his wife.
 

"Every time she will talk back at me I will slap her," a brother told me as I was trying to provide marital counseling for him and his wife. Apparently he had "smacked" her before they came to see me. The mind boggling thing is that when I asked him, "What did she say to you that caused you to hit her?" he replied, "We had an argument and she provoked me so I said to her "Haywaneh!" (you're an animal!) Then she dared to talk back at me saying, "Inteh el Haywan" (you're the animal). Then I exercised my "God given right" to beat her up."
 

Though this is hardly a common idea in our community, if only a few brothers follow this misunderstanding of our religion, it damages their families and it damages our whole community.
 

The opponents of Islam often accuse Islam and Muslims of mistreatment of women and allowing men to beat up their wives referring to the Quranic verse 4:34. Unfortunately some Muslim men do strongly believe that this verse in the Quran gives them some "God given right" to beat their wives.

Posted by GuestBloggers on 9/22/2010 7:29 PM

Written by Imam Abdullah El-Amin, MMNS 

January 24, 2008

Courtesy of Muslim Media Network

“Men are the maintainers and protectors of women, because ALLAH has given the one more (strength) than He has given the other, and because they support them from their means. Therefore, the righteous women are devoutly obedient and guard what ALLAH would have them guard. As to those women on who you feel disloyalty and ill-conduct, first admonish them, next refuse to share their beds, and finally, beat them (lightly); but if they return to obedience, seek not against them means (of annoyance): for ALLAH is Most High, Great (above you all). "

 

Holy Qur’an 4:34

The above verse has been the topic of much discussion and disagreement in the Muslim world for many years. The biggest question from the ayah 34 is whether ALLAH allows men to physically beat, hit, or strike women. For all practical purposes and logical thinking, the answer is NO. This, even though the majority of the Muslim world have accepted and justified the practice of hitting women and say it is sanctioned by ALLAH. If you look at our beautiful, delicate females, and think, you will come to the realization that it is not logically feasible that ALLAH, the sole Creator of us all, would give men carte blanche to hit women if the men are not satisfied with them. The Holy Prophet (s) has never been reported to have struck any of his wives. And isn’t he our example?

Posted by GuestBloggers on 9/22/2010 3:24 PM

In Islam, does God permit husbands to beat disloyal wives? A new translation of the Qur'an says no--but will this take hold?

Interview by Andrea Useem
Courtesy: Beliefnet

While many Muslims say that Islam liberates women, one verse in the Qur'an has sparked debate on this idea for years. According to many popular English translations, verse 4:34 instructs Muslim men who "fear disloyalty and ill-conduct" from their wives to first admonish them, then refuse to sleep with them, and then "beat them (lightly)." Does that verse mean that in Islam, God permits husbands to beat their wives?

Non-Muslims often wonder if this verse justifies domestic violence. At the least, doesn’t it reinforce the idea that women are inferior to men? A new English translation of the Qur'an, published by Iranian-American scholar Laleh Bakhtiar this spring, aims to strike down these ideas. Instead of translating the root verb DARABA as "beat them lightly," Bakhtiar translates this key verse to mean "go away from them." She bases her word choice on, among other things, the example of Prophet Muhammad, who, according to prophetic tradition, never hit anyone in his family, not even lightly, and always treated his wives (there were 12 over the course of his lifetime) with respect.
Critics, like "Koran for Dummies" author Sohaib Sultan, argue that Bakhtiar's translation is a "modern-day revisionist report," saying other well-read translations of the Qur'an have always taken the word DARABA to mean something physical. But Bakhtiar says the word has 17 different meanings, the most popular being "to separate."

Posted by Zerqa Abid on 3/21/2010 5:34 PM

Did you know that one in every four women will experience domestic violence in her lifetime?

According to a carefully estimated guess by major Islamic social service organizations in North America, this statistic applies to the Muslim women too. An estimated 1.3 million women are victims of physical assault by an intimate partner each year 2. This number also includes thousands of Muslim women.

Yes, one in every four Muslim women. You must know some who are already abused.

I know many.

Nearly 17,000 people, mainly women, are killed each year by an intimate partner, according to the National Coalition of Domestic Violence, a nonprofit advocacy group based in Denver.

Posted by GuestBloggers on 3/21/2010 5:23 PM
Written by Laila Shaheen

The following article first appeared in Muslim Link.

Domestic violence is a reality in 10 percent of the homes in the United States regardless of ethnicity, socio-economic status or education. That number includes those living in Muslim homes. Often times, women in abusive relationships who decide to leave will end up homeless. The hard economic crisis that we currently face is another factor in the increasing numbers of homeless women in the US. And again, this includes Muslim women.

On March 14th, Sisters in Solidarity to Educate, Respond & Serve (S.I.S.T.E.R.S) held their 3rd Annual Tea, where they honored one woman who has worked diligently to help alleviate the suffering of Muslim women who find themselves suddenly homeless. Sister Asma Hanif, operates a women’s shelter and clinic, Muslimat Al Nisaa, in the Baltimore area. The shelter offers a safe haven to Muslim women and children. While the concept and dream of opening the shelter was initially that of our late sister, Maryam Funches, Asma has carried on with her dream of her dear friend.
Posted by Zerqa Abid on 3/21/2010 4:37 PM

Written by Zerqa Abid

Muzzammil Hassan, the owner and CEO of Bridges TV has been arrested for beheading his wife, Aasiya Zubair.

INNA LILLAHI WA INNA ILAIHI RAJAIUN, indeed everything belongs to Allah (God) and to Him we will return.

This is the news of the year that has once again damaged not only the Muslim image in American society, but it has also damaged our trust and the hope that we place in American Muslim leadership.

It’s been five days now that my family along with the rest of the community has been in shock. The fact that Muzzammil was married to my first cousin before marrying the victim still horrifies us. Ms. Zubair was his third wife. Both of his earlier wives filed divorce on the same grounds of severe domestic violence and abuses.

Contributors

 

Topics

 

Blog List

In The Beginning
Emotional Literacy -- The Key to Preventing Domestic Violence
Feeling Like an Expert?
Forebearance and the Family
The Heartsick Judge
Letter to a Stranger
Aftershock
Cope
Over
Handcuffed
True Love in Marriage – A Mirage, Why?
Wholeness of Love - The Tranquil Home
Greatness of Women
Stand with Purple
Indian Documentary Film Maker Tackles Child Abuse
Cultural Differences and Child Abuse
Adoption in Islam: Not in my house
The Plight of Abused Muslim Parents
Team Up with Ramadan
Revive the Spirit: Do 4 Things for Aasiya
The Origin of The International Purple Hijab Day
E-Wali--A Good Idea
One Easy Thing to Do to Help Keep Kids Safe
Five Tips on Finances / Your Financial Safety Plan
The Issue of Child Abuse: What We Should Do
It's all about Saving Muslim Lives at Home!
Stop Domestic Violence: Wake Up, Speak Up, Team Up
Please Help Me: The Child Abuse Epidemic
On Shaima Alawadi, family violence, and hate crimes
Hurting Homes
Honor is Gender Neutral
My Khutbah Against Domestic Violence
Abuse of Women is Sadly Endemic
Do we have a Will to End Domestic Violence?
Domestic Violence, Islam and Muslim Women
Domestic Violence: A Violation of Islam
Honor and Terror
Muslims Working Against Domestic Violence
Muslim women wage jihad against violence
Imam Zaid Shakir: The Problem of Domestic Abuse
The Wife-Beating issue and its impact on our community
ALLAH Prohibits Domestic Violence
Does the Quran Tolerate Domestic Abuse?
Inviting Muslims to Respond to Domestic Violence
VOICE TO ACTION: Muslims Against Domestic Violence
SISTERS Annual Tea Honors Muslimat Al Nisaa Shelter
Did We ever Bother to know Muzzammil?
Downtown Chicago Event
He Stood Right Here

 

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505.484.8253